Let's begin...
D.E.B.S.
IMDb; Rotten Tomatoes; Sony Pictures; Wikipedia
Okay. I need to say that it's impossible to properly explain anything about this movie without giving away some spoilers about the plot. But a surprising twist comes pretty early in the movie, and it's important to the entire plot, so whatever. But first, let's set up a more basic premise.... The SATs have a hidden test within them that measures aptitude for qualities like lying, cheating, and fighting, or whatever. To find people who would make good spies. Then they get recruited for a secret academy where the students are called D.E.B.S. (Discipline, Energy, Beauty, Strength). The movie centers on a squad of four D.E.B.S. (all of whom we like, I guess). The squad captain is Max, and another member of the team is her best friend Amy, who is famous for getting a perfect score on the hidden test. Although none of the students really know what the test tests... for, exactly. Then there's a girl named Janet, who's very eager to earn her stripes. And a girl named Dominique (played by Devon Aoki, the main reason I wanted to see this movie). She um... smokes alot and affects being French. Throughout the movie, everyone's looking forward to "End Game," which seems to be a sort of prom/graduation, or something.
But meanwhile, the squad is assigned to spy on a master criminal named Lucy Diamond (who we also like), who has just reappeared after being underground for a couple years. She's meeting a Russian assassin, Ninotchka Kaprova (who we like) but... and here's the first big spoiler... it turns out to be a blind date, set up by Lucy's main henchman/best friend, Scud. Apparently Lucy went underground after having her heart broken by some other woman. And things don't go will with Ninotchka. Meanwhile, Amy has recently broken up with her boyfriend Bobby, who's also apparently a student at the academy. (I think male students were called "D.U.D.E.S." or something.) He still loves her, but she doesn't love him. And then she has an interesting encounter with Lucy, who falls for Amy, but disappears before the other D.E.B.S. show up. And then Amy becomes famous for being the only person to face Lucy and live to tell about it.
Later, Lucy breaks into Amy's dorm room and gets her to go out with her, because Amy was writing a thesis on Lucy, but there wasn't much that was actually known about her. So this... whatever. But um, Janet ends up tagging along, and befriends Scud. And she has to keep Amy's secret. Then the head of the academy, I guess, Mrs. Petrie, makes Amy the new squad captain, which bugs Max. And later, while once again chasing down Lucy, Amy gets separated from the others, and takes off with Lucy, and then the whole school starts searching everywhere for the "kidnapped" Amy. Who's actually starting to fall in love with Lucy, herself. Eventually Max, Dominique, and Bobby also learn the truth about Amy and Lucy, and so does Mrs. Petrie. But Max convinces them not to tell anyone else, and gets Amy to go along with a cover story about her having been kidnapped. But, Scud convinces Lucy to go straight (er, give up crime), and return everything she's stolen, in an attempt to win back Amy.
Well. I never expected to like this movie much. Okay, it had some hotties, but other than that it looked like it'd be pretty dumb. And I'm not saying it's not kind of dumb, but mostly it seems dumb in the beginning. After the twist comes, it starts getting better, more interesting. And funny, but also rather dramatic (though perhaps not quite enough to put this under "dramedy"). Anyway, I don't know if I'll ever feel a need to watch it again, but... I think I'll hold onto the DVD just in case. It really did end up being better than I expected. And that's all I can think to say at the moment.
Johnny English
DVD site; IMDb; Movie Tome; Rotten Tomatoes; Wikipedia
Um, okay. So like, this spoofs James Bond-type spy movies. It stars Rowan Atkinson, who I generally think is good. He plays the title character, who I guess works for MI-7. He's a fairly low-level guy, but when all the other agents are killed, he ends up finally getting to live his dream of being a secret agent. He's supposed to guard the crown jewels, but they get stolen. And um, so like, Johnny... well, he pretty much takes "bumbling" to a whole new level. Still, he and his more competent sidekick, Bough, manage to figure out who's behind the jewel theft- a French businessman named Pascal Sauvage, who has a master plan to become king of England. And beyond that, he has an evil plan for what to do with the country, which I rather liked. There's also a woman named Lorna Campbell (who we like), who I guess works for Interpol, and has been watching Sauvage for some time. She'll end up working with English and Bough, though no one else believes Johnny when he insists Sauvage is up to no good. But of course, the good guys win in the end. And there's really not much else I can think to say. The film has its humorous moments, I suppose, but on the whole I just found it... I dunno. Silly. Stupid. Whatever, I dunno. I mean, it was okay and all. I'm glad I watched it. But I feel no need to see it again.